When Love Is Lust/Lost, III.

...continued... from [Part 1] and [Part 2]

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1. Know your worth.

Know your worth and don't give a discount either. You will be treated how you see yourself. Most of the time we accept the love we think we deserve. Most people think when someone dates them, that person is doing them a favour. No one is doing you a favour by dating you. This is where you have to understand the value you bring to a relationship.

2. What is your value?

A lot of people date others for the benefits they stand to derive and when that person now leave them, they start saying that person is wicked. In this world and a relationship, you need to bring something to the table. What value are you bringing to the table other than your body? What would make that person know he or she has lost a rare gem when you guys are no longer together? What will make you so hard to be discarded? I am not saying you go all out trying to impress your partner, but I am only saying rather than think about what do I stand to gain in this relationship, shift your focus to "What can I add to this relationship?" Always leave people better than you met them, whether things work out for you or not.

3. Think long term.

Most people go into a relationship with the mentality of "Let's see how it goes". Always run away from people that say this except you know deep down yourself that you are not ready and you don't want something deep either. If you want more, never settle for uncertainty because it will leave you vulnerable and used. Your goals and how you value yourself will make you know what to settle for.

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4. Find something doing.

Never be idle. We sometimes find fault with little things and start feeling like our whole life depends on our partner when we have nothing doing. It is okay to be romantic, clingy and be in love, yes, but you need to find a purpose for yourself in the midst of it all because this will help you know how and where you can add value in your relationship.

5. Warning signs.

Most people go into a relationship blindly and after being heartbroken, they start thinking love is cruel. There are warning signs to watch out for.
You are not married to him and he is already hitting you? He is already pressuring you for sex and that is all you talk about when you are together? Nothing about how to advance yourself? Nothing about how your future will both look like? All she ever asks you for is money and yet she wouldn't even support you in any way?

Nothing is wrong with these set of people but that brings me to my next point though...

6. Shared values.

Always find someone who has the same value as you. I didn't say someone that is exactly like you, but someone who is understanding and shares the same value as you. We can't all be the same, yes, but find something that connects you with your partner and not just sex.

...to be continued...

Thank you for your time.

My pen doesn't bleed, it speaks, with speed and ease.

Still me,

My tongue is like the pen of a ready writer.

Olawalium; (Love's chemical content, in human form). Take a dose today: doctor's order.