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Relationship Is Mutual, II.

olawaliumPosted for Everyone to comment on, last year5 min read

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Someone might meet your physical expectation but then the cultural values are different and it is something you will have to work towards to achieve. There is nothing that cannot be worked on. It all starts with a mental shift and the ability to communicate. Someone may look so good to you but then you have different values and you might meet the "right" person but distance won’t permit the relationship. This is why you need to understand the place of effort in your relationship and when you are fortunate to find someone who means so much to you and cares for you, you should never forget the place of doing all you can to make such a person happy, and like I always say, it goes both ways.

Pamper your partner and stop focusing on trivialities. No one is perfect and you are not perfect either. You are to love your partner with all their imperfections while they also work on being a better version of themselves. When you weigh the positives over the negatives, then you can see the scale tilting in favour of such a person. It is sad and unfortunate to see two amazing people losing each other due to a lack of appreciation or lack of effort.

You hear stories about how the two of them have been so wonderful together but then they broke up. A relationship is a private party for two people and you need to shut out those who seek to get in between yourself and your partner.

Commitment is key and vital for every relationship. You need to be committed to each other’s growth, be committed to each other’s happiness and be committed to making each other happy. Try to make your relationship a haven for peace and happiness; these two are very important for the success of your relationship.

There should be joy in having each other, loving each other, doing things for each other and being in each other's company. Another thing that might rip your partner’s heart to shreds is joining forces with an external body over him or her. Your allegiance should be with and to each other. If he is forming an allegiance to his family and she is also forming an allegiance to her family, definitely their relationship which is at the center can never hold. You cannot and should not pull your relationship in opposite direction.


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This is not to say that your family has no role in your relationship, they have but it should be to strengthen your relationship. Oftentimes, selfishness and personal agenda always pull a relationship apart. When others drive their spouse through the mud, make sure you hold on to yours. You don’t sell your partner short to outsiders and this is where you get to have cracks that others will help you magnify. Sell him or her short and you won't be able to afford the expensive him or her.

You need to focus on your partner’s strength while you gently address his or her flaws. A relationship is a beautiful thing, don’t attempt to ruin yours. A lot of people sell their partners short to outsiders and it is not surprising to see why people lose regard for such a partner. How you present your partner to others will determine how they will treat such a partner and it says a lot more about you than the terrible things you say about your partner. This is not to say you are covering things up by saying only the good things about your partner, but then it speaks a lot that you are keeping external influences away.

A lot of people don’t understand that a relationship is between two people and never about your army of loyal friends with your partner. This doesn’t mean you will overlook the wrong things your partner is doing, but it only means you have chosen to weigh the good and the bad and then choose to focus your gaze on the good stuff while gently working on his or her shortfalls. The good must always outweigh the bad and domestic violence is a no-no.

You can never find someone who is 100% with his or her character, we all have something to work on and whatever we choose to focus on is what we will always come to see in our relationship. Choose to see the good in your partner and it makes it easier to address issues without trying to stick it in. Don't forget, it's you and your partner, not you and the world. This makes me remember the lady that invited 6 of her friends to a date her boyfriend invited her to just between them and she wondered why the guy didn't pay 🤣😂.


Thank you for your time.


My pen doesn't bleed, it speaks, with speed and ease.

Still me,

My tongue is like the pen of a ready writer.

Olawalium; (Love's chemical content, in human form). Take a dose today: doctor's order.

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