I tried to catch a goose

Today I spent the day at a golf course taking pictures of a golf tournament. It is a yearly event for military veterans and I have been the photographer for the even every year. It is usually pretty fun and a good way to hang out with other veterans and drive golf carts around.

There was a pretty big group of like 15 geese near one of the ponds and some of my buddies bet me that I couldn't go out and touch one of them. Now, if you are familiar with me and my wildlife adventures, you may remember my encounter with a wild baboon in Africa where I stared him down as he was walking within about 5 feet from me and he turned and walked away. That gave me plenty of time to go clean the poop out of my pants because that guy could have ripped me to shreds.

Anyways, back to the geese. I picked a nice group of them that had the biggest ones. I figured if they were bigger, they might be a little bit slower. I bet these things probably weighed about 30 pounds or so. I wanted to find out.

As I started to get closer, they started honking and making their dumb geese noises at me. They were raising their heads and started to walk away. I got close to one of them and he started hissing and making stupid noises at me. I think he was getting ready to strike.

I wanted to see if it would bite, so I got closer, but it chickened out, or is it geesed out? I don't know. Either way, it ran away down into the weeds near the pond. I didn't want to go after it and fall into the water and look dumb, so I turned towards one of the geese that was watching all of this unfold so I took off running towards that one.

Those stupid things are pretty fast even if they are too fat to fly off. It spread its wings like it was trying to take off while it was honking and running away like a little goose bitch, but it was still too fast for me. I probably could have caught it if part of my lung wasn't dead and I was still recovering from blood clots.

One of these days I will be able to catch a goose. Maybe then I will get a golden egg from it.

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